Like Kindergarten Cop and Agent Cody Banks before it, this hyperactive reboot of the beloved ’70s Disney flicks was ostensibly made for kids to watch and enjoy but contains a mite too much menace and violence to really be appropriate for them.

It takes the original idea of two teen siblings (Alexander Ludwig and AnnaSophia Robb) with unusual abilities and mixes in an ex-con cabbie (Dwayne Johnson) and disgraced astrophysicist (Carla Gugino) to help the kids recover their spaceship from the Area 51-like facility of the title.

Among the bright spots are Johnson, who brings a nice, light touch, and Gugino (Righteous Kill), who makes for a funny and beautiful brainiac. There’s also a reasonably exciting car chase in which Johnson outmaneuvers pursuing government agents and then watches as Ludwig, who can alter his molecular density, takes out one of their cars simply by letting it crash into him. It’s a pretty cool shot.

The film also mines some pleasant humor from Robb’s ability to read minds, like when she translates to a peeved Johnson the thoughts of a dog that is none pleased with the big guy’s attitude, or lets Johnson know what Gugino really thinks of him. And for those old enough to remember, the now-grown child stars of the original films make brief appearances, she as a waitress and he as a sheriff.

But in an attempt to appease adults, director Andy Fickman (The Game Plan) throws in soldiers with assault rifles shooting at kids, Johnson beating up people or tossing them through large windows, a rather ugly alien assassin who knocks Johnson around, and a few too many fireballs. It’s intense and mean-spirited mayhem better suited for actual action films, not a PG-rated family flick.

Other problems include the annoying agent who constantly whines about not having a gun, the stock government top dog (Ciarán Hinds) who’s cold as ice and says mean things, and the kids, who possess little to no personality. Not to mention the flying saucer escape sequence that feels frantic instead of exciting and wondrous.

In the end, it’s a movie meant more for a generation of kids raised on video games and cell phones than for a generation (that is, mine) that grew up with phones of the rotary-dial variety. And while it’s certainly not a movie to text home about, it’ll probably entertain them well enough. – [DVD]

Adventure/Family/Sci-Fi/Fantasy

Rated PG

DVD Release Date: 8/4/09

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