Jolie plays a British woman being trailed by Scotland Yard because of her romantic link to a mysterious, and wanted, man who apparently underwent plastic surgery to elude both the authorities and the man (Steven Berkoff) from whom he stole money. Via a letter, he instructs Jolie to board a train, find a man with his physical dimensions and make those watching believe that that man his him.

For its first forty minutes or so, the film possesses just the right note of elegant deception as we watch Jolie coolly ditch the authorities in Paris, board said train to Venice and latch onto Depp’s daffy American. Their initial conversation, in which Jolie verbally dominates Depp–advising him on how to talk to women, telling him she hates his name–is the film’s highlight.

But as soon as Depp stumbles his way across a slippery Venice rooftop, and subsequently knocks a policeman into the water, you realize director Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck (The Lives of Others) doesn’t mean for us to take any of this seriously. Which is a mistake, because he proves incapable of meshing the comic elements with the more serious ones.

The film suffers as a result. The action scenes, including Jolie’s ridiculous boat rescue of Depp that features the unintentionally hilarious sight of Jolie fending off a henchman with a life preserver, are listless. And forget about suspense. What little there is dissipates the second we learn of Jolie’s true motives. The finale, which involves a safe and lots of surveillance, is dull as dishwater.

Pluses include the beautiful Venice scenery and, of course, Jolie, who was made for movies like this. She not only rocks expensive-looking dresses and sports an impeccable British accent, but raises looking cool and detached to an art form. She even gets to prove she can act thanks to a nicely done scene where she admits to Depp how she truly loves and misses her mystery man.

As for Depp, well, he just seems miscast playing a guy whom a British agent (Paul Bettany) rightly refers to as a moron. His performance is a little too broad, and I never believed Jolie could fall for him. He looks a little absurd, too, with his goatee and bohemian hairdo. As such the only thing he really convinced me of here is that he knows how to light up a cigarette. – [DVD] [Blu-Ray]

Action/Drama/Romance

Rated PG-13

DVD Release Date: 3/22/11

As much as Darwin is demonized by the religious right, it is important to note that he was extremely conflicted about publishing his controversial work, and very troubled, in fact, by the cruelty of the universe he was trying to make sense of. Creation’s focus is on this internal conflict, and its first half is surprisingly melancholy and psychological. Bettany’s Darwin is haunted by hallucinations of his recently deceased daughter and can’t stop dwelling on the violence and chaos he perceives in nature. The film, eager to slip inside his tormented mind, brings the audience along as he imagines, for instance, a baby bird dying and being consumed by the insects and maggots that its mother was feeding it with just minutes earlier. These sequences are the sort of thing one might expect from David Cronenberg or Werner Herzog, and are not often seen in a stately period biopic. Not only are they bold for this reason, but also because such scenes express what some find so frightening about so-called Darwinism. Kudos to the filmmakers for acknowledging this in so potent a fashion.

Later on, as Darwin engages more deeply with his wife and confronts his grief over his daughter’s death, a more contemplative and redemptive tone prevails. I found the film’s depiction of a non-believer’s grief particularly resonant. Creation is certainly not the first film I’ve seen that makes the argument that faith can be distinguished from religious belief, but it makes it particularly well. Darwin’s religious wife Emma is played by Bettany’s real-life wife Jennifer Connelly, and their relationship has an honesty and comfort to it that benefits tremendously from the leads’ natural chemistry. The external pressures on Darwin to publish or repent are offered by excellent supporting players Toby Jones and Jeremy Northam, as Thomas Huxley and Reverend John Innes, respectively. Their prickliness and pushiness reflect the tragic animosities that sometimes occur between friends separated by dogma. Ultimately, though, the film lives and dies on Bettany’s performance, and he carries it all the way. – [DVD]

Biography/Drama

Rated PG-13

DVD Release Date: 6/29/10

Seems that God is once again unhappy with humanity, so the buff Bettany (as the angel Michael) falls to Earth, hacks off his wings, arms himself to the teeth and rushes off to Quaid’s out-of-the-way Arizona diner so he can save an unborn baby whose birth will save mankind.

It’s silly stuff, sure. I mean, c’mon, the diner is called “Paradise Falls,” and Bettany keeps solemnly intoning that, “It’s started” or “They’re here.” And most of the characters are one-dimensional irritants (see: Adrianne Palicki) whose job is to either move the plot along or get picked off by the throngs of angel-inhabited citizens–little boys and girls included–who keep showing up.

Luckily, I couldn’t care less about any of that, seeing as I’m a big fan of B-movies like this one that are set in an isolated location and feature semi-familiar stars (see: Kate Walsh or Jon Tenney). I’m also a fan of explosions, of which this movie has many. There are some sweet effects here, too, like the ominous cloud of locusts or the masses of angels swooping through the sky.

Acting-wise, Bettany is best, not only because he actually looks kind of otherworldly, but because he briefly manages to give the film some depth as he explains why he betrayed his fellow angels. Character actor Charles S. Dutton lends some warmth, while Quaid is cranky, Lucas Black plays a guy named “Jeep” and Tyrese Gibson is just plain hostile.

As is the relationship between Bettany and the angel Gabriel (the physically imposing Kevin Durand of TV’s Lost), who battles it out with his fair-haired brother in the film’s best scene. They punch and kick each other, employ a mace and demonstrate just how dangerous an angel’s wings can be. And yet, it still doesn’t beat watching that little old lady smack Dennis Quaid across a room. – [DVD] [Blu-Ray]

Action/Fantasy/Thriller

Rated R

DVD Release Date: 5/11/10

The gimmick here is that Fraser can bring characters in books to life by reading from them aloud. In turn someone from real life gets drawn into the books. This apparently happened to Fraser’s wife with the title tome and he needs a new copy so he can read her back out, but his search for one is hampered by the book’s big bad guy (Andy Serkis), whom Fraser unintentionally released.

I like that the film endorses reading books, and I really like the idea of being able to read people out of them. And it’s fun watching familiar literary creations pop up– the ticking crocodile from “Peter Pan,” the flying monkeys and Toto from “The Wizard of Oz” and Rapunzel herself. Not to mention a Minotaur and Excalibur, which Serkis tries to pry loose from its rock.

But the direction by Softley (The Skeleton Key) is so utterly uninspired as to suck from the film any charm or sense of wonder, and the top-notch effects and talented cast, which includes Helen Mirren, Paul Bettany and Jim Broadbent, struggle to compensate. What’s more Fraser, a pro at not taking big effect flicks too seriously, merely mopes around. And the supposedly epic ending is epically unexciting.

Serkis is OK as the sneering villain who loves duct tape, Mirren adds some pep as Fraser’s book-loving aunt, and Broadbent is amusing as the the title tome’s author. He gets the film’s best line, too, at one point yelling to Bettany, “You don’t have to be selfish just because I wrote you like that!”

As a fire-eater read out of the book by Fraser, Bettany, in fact, is the best thing here. He manages some decent depth as a man who misses his wife (Jennifer Connelly in a cameo) and kid and the life he has inside the book. We actually kind of feel for him and his plight, which is more than I can say about anyone or anything else in this infuriatingly inert film. – [DVD]

Adventure/Fantasy/Family

Rated PG

DVD Release Date: 6/25/09

Dakota Fanning, the busiest little actress in Hollywood, plays a young girl in the South in 1964 who flees with her housekeeper (Jennifer Hudson) from her abusive father (Paul Bettany) and finds refuge with a trio of black sisters who live in the town where her mother grew up.

The film’s uglier elements, like Bettany’s treatment of Fanning and Hudson’s being beaten by white men, will likely irk anyone expecting a violence-free experience. But such unpleasantness gives way soon enough to a soft piano score and beautifully photographed scenes of sun-dappled South Carolina (really North Carolina) that seem designed more or less to attract tourists.

Fanning is good here, but though she’s still leagues ahead of other actresses her age, it’s not her best work. Hudson is adequate in a role that doesn’t require much of her, as is Alicia Keyes as the most serious-minded of said sisters, and Bettany is in stale wife-beater mode. Sophie Okonedo, however, gives a sweet, sensitive performance as the childlike sister who is too easily pained by the state of the world.

But the film belongs to Queen Latifah, who plays the most level-minded sister. Though you know that no one could possibly be that saintly, she nearly proves you wrong, doling out sage advice and nuggets of wisdom and administering comfort in the kind of soothing voice that would make Heath Ledger’s Joker repent for his sins.

And it’s all directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, who a number of years ago made the much better Love & Basketball. [DVD]

Adventure/Drama

Rated PG-13

DVD Release Date: 2/4/09